A Father’s Love.

17 Jun

I have always been a daddy’s girl, and that fact hasn’t changed even though I’m no longer a little girl. When I was growing up, my dad was my number one supporter. Though I know that my mom supported and loved me as well, there’s something really special about the relationship between a father and his daughter that can’t be replaced by any other kind of love.

Besides loving and supporting me completely and without hesitation, my dad has taught me practically everything I know about life, love, and what it means to chase my dreams and follow my heart. However, one of the greatest things about my dad is the fact that he understands me. He understands my feelings so well that more often than not I don’t have to say much of anything for him to know how I’m feeling. There’s something really incredible about knowing someone who is connected with you in such a way where you don’t even have to say a word for them to know what you’re trying to say.

I remember one specific memory from Shriner’s after my first intense operation in 2003. I had intense physical therapy at Shriner’s twice a day, and my mom and dad switched off every few weeks in terms of who was staying with me at Shriner’s Hospital in Greenville, SC. My dad was unable to be at Shriner’s as much as my mom could, but he was there as much as possible. Anyway, I remember one day right before going to PT. I had to be put into a small wheelchair with my legs strapped down into a bent position. I should also point out that before my intense PT I was in long-leg casts for eight weeks. Therefore, attempting to bend your knees after having your legs completely straight for eight weeks is a kind of pain that I can’t even begin to describe. Anyway, my dad was attempting to strap my legs down, but even before he put the leg plates on the wheelchair in a position where my knees would have to be bent, I started to cry. Not small whimpers, but the kind of sobs that come up out of your chest when you’re scared, in pain, and can hardly breathe. Even though my dad knew that he had to have my knees bent before taking me to PT, he couldn’t do it. I remember looking at him to see the anguish, fear and pain that I was feeling mirrored on his face as well. It was one of the first vivid memories that I have of my dad crying. Even though I didn’t know it at the time, this was a memory that I would come back to in my mind every time I was trying to describe the intense love that my dad has for me. I come back to this memory not because it brought me pain and fear, but because even though it shows my dad’s love for me, it also shows his empathetic nature that I have found within myself over the past few years.

Webster’s dictionary defines love as “an intense feeling of deep affection,” which seems fitting since scientists and poets and musicians alike have all been looking for the true definition of love for centuries. As well as teaching me empathy, my dad has also taught me what love truly is. From holding his hand ever since I was a little girl to the recent days of listening to him relearn how to play the guitar, I have known what love is through my dad’s expression of it towards me. Not a day goes by that I am not grateful to have such an amazing father in my life. And even though I am getting older, I know that my dad will always be here to welcome me home into one of his hugs that holds more love than I can even express. So yes, today is Father’s Day, the day that we go out of our way to tell our dads how much they mean to us. However, for me, every day is Father’s Day. No amount of words can express the insane amount of love I have for the man who taught me to follow my heart, no matter what.

“My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person: he believed in me.”

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11 Responses to “A Father’s Love.”

  1. Errign June 17, 2012 at 5:27 pm #

    Love this 🙂

  2. photosfromtheloonybin June 17, 2012 at 5:35 pm #

    Simply beautiful!! This brought tears to my eyes.

    • ameliaclaire92 June 17, 2012 at 5:36 pm #

      Aw thank you. 🙂 I’m glad you liked it. 🙂

  3. Lisa W. Rosenberg June 18, 2012 at 12:18 am #

    Such an intense and beautiful memory. Though many of us have never experienced the physical pain you felt that day or the emotional pain your father felt making you bend your legs, your description makes it so powerful.

    • ameliaclaire92 June 18, 2012 at 12:21 am #

      Honestly, I’m glad that it came across to you as powerful, simply because when I write about the pain that I felt I want others to still be able to feel the intensity of it even if they don’t know what the specific pain feels like. That’s something I’ve had to work hard on in reference to so many of the painful memories that I’m writing about for my memoir.

  4. LA Edwards June 18, 2012 at 2:31 am #

    A – That was brilliantly written. I had the same adoration and love for my father as you have for yours. My world crashed when he passed away. It was too soon, and to this day even though it has been 27 years this year the pain of his passing remains. No one will ever fill the empty space I feel knowing he is gone and missed out on so much of my life. I am happy for you that you have those memories of your father and that he has been there to teach you so many important lessons not many are fortunate to have. Your dad sounds like a a special man. Thanks for sharing something so coveted with us all who read your blog. Best of luck to you on your travels in two days! I will be thinking of you a bit envious as our travels for the year have been delayed due to the severe illness of our kitty and all that entails. Find some luck and a pot of gold and be nice and thoughtful of the leprechauns and fairies, and watch for the trolls when you cross over the bridges. Most of all have fun!

  5. 4amWriter June 20, 2012 at 5:56 am #

    Beautiful. Such lovely thoughts.

  6. belasbrightideas June 20, 2012 at 8:09 pm #

    Amelia, I am always uplifted hearing stories such as yours. My father was complex – taught me my love of nature and the outdoors, yet was a volatile abuser. So it’s indeed a pleasure to witness fathers out there who are safe and worthy of our love and devotion. Thanks, hon.

  7. Ellen Stumbo June 20, 2012 at 9:49 pm #

    I just spent a while reading your blog. My little girl has CP and I am so glad to see you are writing a memoir (another thing in common, I am a writer too) This post about your dad is beautiful. So glad I found you!

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